I can’t seem to talk to him.

Dear Suzie, 


I have recently met somebody who i feel likes me back,i only see him once a month but he always makes the effort to speak to me but i cant seem to say anything back?it’s because i dont know whether he is stringing me along. my best friends likes his older friend to,they are the same accept he never makes the effort with her. both me and my friend are confused,what should we do?


When you’re shy and inexperienced it often is hard to manage the “getting to know you” phases of a new relationship. You like them and hope they like you. You want them to know how you feel, and need to know how they feel about you. Trouble is, it’s easy to fall into “playing it cool” games.


You say you can’t seem to talk to him because you don’t know whether he’s stringing you along. But why assume that? He’s making the effort to talk because he likes you – is that so hard to believe? Sounds to me as if both you and his friend find it hard to overcome your own feelings of shyness and lack of confidence. And I’m afraid there’s only one remedy for that – plenty of practise.  


You need to make the effort to talk, to communicate, to interact. It’s easy, really; stop obsessing about yourself and start thinking about him. What does he like to do, to watch, to play, to listen to? Don’t know? Then find out. He talks to you so follow his lead and talk to him. Good luck!

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