Dear Suzie, My hubby has had his prostate removed and cannot get an erection. He has given me permission to get sex else where. His quite keen on me having it of with his best friend and I must say so am I. What should I do ???
Do what you and your husband decide after a proper discussion. It’s your sex life – only you can sort it out. Sorry – it’s not my place to collude or give you permission for this scenario. Being an adult means having to make your own decisions.
All I will say is that while in real life some people may react to the loss of potency by encouraging their partners to go elsewhere, and get some satisfaction from having some control over sex by proxy, most would find it exceedingly painful. The fantasy may seem beguiling, the real experience far less so. I have encountered many people who have experienced this frustrating situation. All would have found it painful in the extreme to have adultery added to impotency. Before going any way along this line I would strongly recommend talking it over with the help of a Relate counsellor.
And any couple facing such a situation should discuss it properly with their GP. Doctors sometimes forget the sexual aspect of such operations, or feel awkward in asking questions. There is a wide range of help now available and a wide range of sexual behaviour that a couple with erection problems can indulge in and enjoy together. My advice would be that adultery, even permitted adultery, should stay the stuff of fantasy not real life.